update soon :P

 i'm still alright, i just really needed the long break

talked to a bunch of people and they made me feel better about you. hope you are alright. i feel like i've been very hard on you!! i'm sorry!it's a bit difficult to navigate not knowing what you're really thinking but really all i can do is trust you and wait. also you have way more support than you believe!

thanks for the imaginary origami!! 😸

i'm trying to take care of myself the best you can so at least you don't worry. i hope you are too! i'm staying strong for you and i expect the same from you heh

Comments

  1. AnonymousOctober 10, 2025 at 10:41 PM

    I’m sorry for causing you so much trouble. I’m glad you were able to talk to people though. The worst thing you can do is just isolate yourself- I mean, I even talk to you to my mom still because I have no one else to talk to. I actually had therapist appointment today and it went well, but it made me realize about myself that I’m not proud of- mainly everything about myself and my life. How things possibly got to this point as well. Either way, it went well.

    If you really want to know how I feel I can tell you. I think it would be in both of our best interest to lose feelings for each other. Easier said than done, i know. Don’t think that I don’t want you in my life or that I’ve completely forgotten about you. I haven’t. I still dream about you and have thoughts about you. I still hope that I’ll see you sometime and that I’ll talk to you. That things are going to get better and I’ll come back to you. I think at times things are normal and fine and when I try to update you on something I forget it’s not normal and fine. I wanted to tell you that the moon looked very pretty today and that you should take a chance to look at it if you could because I thought you’d enjoy it, but then I realized I’m completely alone and that I actually can’t reach out to you.
    I think we both have needs and wants that the other person is unable to change and adapt for each other because it’s quite literally impossible for the both of us. Just as how you can’t lose yourself, I can’t either. I also think we’ve both know this, maybe you more than me. We’ve just been playing this game of catch up and trying to see how things could possibly work out. Reality has caught up and we have to accept that things maybe things weren’t in our favor. I very much wonder why there were so many coincidences in my relationship with you. Like straight up WAYYYY too many things. It made me feel secure and it made me feel like I was doing the correct thing with you. It felt like our relationship was blessed and it felt like the most freeing thing ever. I still do think that everything was too strange or too perfect on my side in way. I even told my mom about that and she had a hard time telling me why things happened the way it did… Which is why I find it so hard to let go of you. But I think at the end of the day it’s not what the world and the signs and things tell me, it’s about what we both need. I am convinced you need someone else that can help you get through your problems easier than I can and I am convinced that I need to fulfill my spiritual needs. I’m sorry that I wasn’t strong enough to drop everything for you. I’m sure you think it’s easier for me to leave everything (my spirituality and my family who “does not accept me” and is “limiting my freedom” )than it is for you to adapt to my ways and even with that it’s literally impossible. I see the logic in that, I really do. Nothing I am doing I sense or feel any immorality and if I were not religious, I’d be completely okay. I thought I could work with my spiritual life and being with you if we both could believe in the same thing together. I really did believe things could have worked out if things went that way, but again. Just like you can’t change for me because you need to keep that for yourself, I know that I should stick to what I believe to be right as well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. AnonymousOctober 10, 2025 at 10:49 PM

      I think this was the best possible outcome to everything. I really thank you for helping me choose. I just knew that if I left that things wouldn’t be the same and that’s why I was so stuck up on the idea of being with you and staying with you. I say this with my room still being a complete mess with things in my car and everything packed and ready to go lol. I’ve unpacked a bit, but I’m still not fully through the denial stage yet. My body is also so very heavy. Ahh I miss everyone and I miss you. I wish we can all hug and forget everything happened.

      Delete
    2. AnonymousOctober 10, 2025 at 11:08 PM

      Good night Robin :) Sleep well. Please take care of yourself, I’ll be thinking of you. I’ll talk to you soon ♡

      Delete
    3. AnonymousOctober 10, 2025 at 11:08 PM

      Soon as in tomorrow lol I’m not leaving you like that ToT

      Delete
  2. AnonymousOctober 11, 2025 at 12:11 PM

    Listening to the Spotify playlist I made for you while doing chores very nice

    ReplyDelete

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